Does your life resemble a break-up movie? If so, here are some red flags you had missed so far In the battle of sexes, we have always tried to interpret signs and situations to figure out where the relationship is going. Despite watching ‘He’s Just Not Into You’ several times, you still have no clue whether your man will give you a solitaire anytime soon or you are just smelling the wrong flower. Clinical psychologist Dr Sanjoy Mukherjee helps you read the warning signs in your relationship.
- No future planning: Your warning bells should start ringing if he refuses to talk about a future together. Healthy relationships are always forward-moving and even if he's busy or tied-up, he will try to fit you in his scheme of things somehow.
- He refuses to acknowledge the relationship in public: If your guy only meets you when he wants to, clearly you are not his priority. He likes spending hours with other friends and knows that he can simply give you a ring and you will be available. Once this happens two or three times, it becomes routine, and it's a difficult pattern to break. If he keeps on introducing you as just a ‘friend’, then there is trouble.
- Criticism is a pattern: A partner who criticises you all the time for small things like the way you talk, eat, dress and seems to be starting fights all the time, is not a sign of a healthy relationship. The red flags should start fluttering because the person who loves you will always respect you for what you are. If he's into you, he will be interested in everything you do. If there is no interest, it is not a relationship.
- He wants an ‘open’ relationship: It is important that both of you to play the field until a commitment is in picture. But discussing your respective dating lives is a strict no-no. If he talks about the women he dates, it could be a sign that he doesn't take your feelings seriously. Even after dating for a while, he wants to keep it casual and doesn’t care what you do when he's not around, then it's time to say goodbye.
- He doesn’t believe in hard work: If he's not willing to make any effort for you, then it implies that he wants you to do all the hard work in the relationship. All relationships are built upon mutuality. It's important to take these little signs into consideration, and remember that you deserve better. If you have been the one calling, then something is surely wrong. Step back, and put yourself on phone restriction. If he's interested, he'll call. If he's not, he won't. Yes, it will be painful but it will allow you to realize that you indeed deserve better, and this will help you move on.
- He tells you that he doesn’t want you: If he says that he is not into you, believe him.It's easy to rationalize his feelings and tell yourself that he will change his mind soon, but, when it comes down to it, you're only fooling yourself. Besides, if you think he’s a liar, then why are you with him? Face it. You deserve someone better.
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